R O M I S O

The Boom tells this story to his Chemistry students when they are studying types of mixtures and solutions. After this they will never forget the difference between homogeneous and heterogeneous mixtures.

Romiso was a very obese and somewhat disgusting individual. He smoked. and he stank like a smoker. Furthermore he usually had tobacco juice dripping down his chin. His matches seldom ignited because they were soaked in sweat. He was always begging others for food, matches or cigarettes.

In general... YUK!

Bie had an antique Chevrolet sedan with a large square front windshield. At Abe Lincoln High, many students would lunch in their cars.

On this occasion, Bie, Newell, and Trow were in the front seat. Romiso occupied the entire back seat. Romiso was attacking an egg sandwich.

Then Romiso sneezed!

The front windshield bore three silhouettes. It was easy to tell that egg sandwiches are heterogeneous. There were bits of egg white, egg yolks, lettuce, mayonnaise, and a multitude of other ingredients all over the windows. And it was a non-uniform distribution. Heterogeneous!

One day a group of us high school kids were at the end of the Santa Cruz Wharf. Romiso was unfortunately present. He was big enough to be omnipresent.

"Give me cookies! Come on, I need cookies for this!"

"Forget it, Romiso. Get your own cookies."

"You guys need to see this. I'm the world champion. Come on give me cookies. No kidding, I'm the world's champion."

"OK, you slob, here," said Newell.

Romiso dug deeply into the cookie bag. Mutilated pieces were stuffed into his mouth. Crumbs were all over his sweaty shirt.

"Cmonmnonovllertodaraaaal," he mumbled through his overstuffed oral cavern.

"What are you trying to say, you pig?" demanded Trow.

"Aysaaaidcommmmovertodadraaaal."

"He wants us to come over to the rail," said Walt.

"OK, what is it going to be this time?" we wondered.

Romiso leaned over the railing and proceeded to expectorate. The viscous fluid slowly emanated from his mouth and slowly lowered itself toward the ocean below. It was incredible. It went five meters before it stopped, hovered, and then it returned into Romiso's mouth.

Three times he accomplished this feat before it broke free.

"I call this the yo yo spit," he informed us after it was over.

All of this time one could observe the bits of cookie within the pendant effluent.

Definitely a heterogeneous and viscous situation with high surface tension.

So, students, you'll never forget the meaning of heterogeneous!